‘Tis The Season

December has hit so it’s officially the season to be jolly (fat, in this month jolly should always be read as fat), so here are some tips on how to allow the jolliness to gather around your organs like a little scarf of knitted together adipose.


13 thoughts on “‘Tis The Season

    • Great scott!

      I get annoyed when people put up their decorations and tree up in November, but kinda understand it. By then they’ve already had a month or so of Christmas stuff in the shops. I kinda follow tradition. Decorations can go up at the start of December, and the tree on December 13th (twelve days of Christmas style).

      • Actually, the twelve days of Christmas is from the 25th of December to the 6th of January. Traditionally, The tree and other decorations are meant to go up on Christmas Eve and be taken down on the feast of the Epiphany.

        • Our tradition is a compromise between what I’m used to and what Kim is used to.

          The decorations can go up any time in the month, but are usually left until the tree goes up because we don’t do many beyond that. The tree keeps to the twelve days of Christmas tradition but the days are moved so that they lead up to Christmas Day instead of from Christmas Eve. She doesn’t get them up all month but she also doesn’t have to wait most of the month either.

  1. I look out of the window and i see a mild day in March. I go outside, and I don’t even have to put on a coat. There are small plants sprouting from the moist ground. Any time the cherry tree will blossom.

    White Christmas – a myth of past times.

    • The word is “fried”. If they didn’t get themselves fried in the first place they did not have to fear any fabled ones. It’s like women who dress in a certain way and get upset when catcalled on the street.

      Why did the skanky clad maiden cross the street?

      By the way, it did snow yesterday. For five minutes. At the moment yet another storm is tearing apart everybody’s houses. It’s good to live in a 300 year old house with two feet thick solid brick walls and 11 ton of reed as a roof. Come any kind of wheather, earthquakes and thunder, we’ll just close the door and wait it out.

      • Bloody catcalling. I understand why women get pissed at it, but the definition has changed. In my day (when the chicken turned straight to muscle and everything I said was followed by a knowing look at an imagined camera, perhaps with the sun catching my teeth and glinting off them) catcalling was what builders did. They’d whistle from the top of scaffolding or shout romantic things like “Get ya norks out, luv!” Before continuing, I feel it’s worth addressing the youth of today. No woman has ever heard the word “Norks” and been suddenly overcome with an urge to mate with the person who said it, or even to strip off and reveal the mythical creatures. Using that word only signifies to women that you’re ten years old, and that they’d be paedophiles to even think of you sexuality.

        Anyway, the definition seems to have changed these days to “any uncalled for interaction with a man”. A guy can ask the time and, because he’s asked a woman, he can be called out for catcalling or at least harassing the woman. Having said that, the opposite is also true. One guy on that famous catcalling video followed the girl for like ten minutes, talking at her while she ignored him. That’s not catcalling, it’s bloody stalking.

        Personally I believe that a woman should be able to wear whatever she wants and walk along the street without harassment of any kind. I also believe that both men and women have a responsibility to think about what they’re wearing before they leave the house. The amount of times I’ve seen a girl bend over in the street with a skirt that can’t hide the fact she’s got nothing underneath. And we’re not talking nighttime on the way to clubs here, we’re talking middle of the day when people are shopping with their kids. Don’t get me started in the whole wearing see through tights as leggings (with or without pants) or guys wearing their trousers underneath their arses (advertising what they’re wiling to give to other guys for protection in prison talk). End of the day, you can’t expect for others to not react to your clothing (whether over positively or negatively) if you’re completely unwilling to take the responsibility of thinking about others that comes along with dressing yourself.

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